The time has come to stop wearing any sort of item found on a beach as jewelry

I am troubled and perplexed, but hopeful. A few minutes ago I noticed in the student center a young, well-intentioned boy who was attemting tag-team double impact of the two most common necklaces that are made of sea-shells. The first is that kind with tiny sheet like pieces in succession, the second was the kind with the oval shell that resembles a shark or whale's mouth. The 10 minutes since this occurred have been spent in deep, retrospective meditation to understand the complex psychology behind such a sight, but am left bereft of explanation that does not involve the universe weeping. In that void, however, I find a dull solace in the hopes that at least one poor soul will decide this day to be the last that they will wear sea-shell jewelry.